I've struggled with my mental health since I was a teenager. What I first attributed to growing up without one of my parents, I would learn over time, was a deficit in certain things in my brain chemistry that contribute to my susceptibility to depression and anxiety. As many do, I struggled silently for many years. Experiencing broken relationships, job firings, fits of rage, confusion, forgetfulness, and so on. It has taken incredible focus, diligence, humility, and patience to actively work on my mental health, and every day is a new challenge. Even after 10 years (and counting) of therapy, medication and mindfulness routines, I still find myself struggling at times and trying to find the right answers to get through the day. It takes that effort every day. Don't be discouraged that it doesn't seem to get better because it will. And truthfully, it's likely better than you give yourself credit for. Keep fighting. There are lot's of people counting on you, most importantly, you are counting on you.